Fresh scent of Douglas Fir

snnnniiiiiiifffffff! ahhh! The lovely tingly scent of Douglas fir fills my nose and home. It's scent sends me on a mental trip of days spent running through the forests of my home as a child, with my trusty golden retriever "Regal" beside me. Times making forts, and spying on the local wildlife. Times not so long ago, of silently slipping like a shade through the grey early morning light on my birthday, bow in hand. It was raining, and being my first hunting season I was completely unprepared for the weather. Soaked to the bone through a few layers of Cotton Tshirts, all I could feel was the heat of the hunt. I had stumbled into a heard of deer in the woods taking shelter. I found myself for the first time with the very real possibility of killing a deer with my bow. My heart pounded and adrenalin rushed. It came to a point near exploding when I drew down on the calm and unsuspecitng doe. I'll never forget the wet slap of the feathers as they whisked by my face. In the end the only thing I ate that night was "tag soup", still I was hooked, no more then just hooked, I was a willing lover of the bow hunt. My wife's lovely voice calls me back to reality. How does one describe to another these things when she asks "why do you love Douglas fir as yule trees? over the noble fir?".

So tomorrow is our little pagan tribe's winter solstice celebration and ritual. We have a lot planned. Starting at 2:00pm we'll have wreath building. 3:30-4:30 will be ritual. Following the ritual will be Potluck till about 6:30. The festivities will end with a trip to the local light show at the zoo. I won't be leading the ritual this time. Another witch from the group will be doing that. She has never done a group ritual before, but I have looked over what she has come up with and I think it's pretty good. Interestingly, we have had rain the last couple days and they are calling for more rain tomorrow. I hope it will hold off long enough that we can do this outside. If not we will bring it inside. If that is the case I can say that it will be the first time I have had to do an indoor sabot in 3 years. Living in the desert does have some advantages.

On Sunday I head back to my hometown, my parents, and mostly my kids. I miss them like I miss the smell of Douglas fir. I miss them as I miss a part of who I am. Yet I hate being away from my b'loved wife too. These trips are filled with bitter sweetness both in the coming and the going. Perhaps someday the holy kindred will see fit to bring these two parts of me together.