Flow

The river rumbles and tumbles,

it bumbles and fumbles,

it races by with nary a pause

in its passing,

It holds onto nothing

yet carries away mountains.

--Davin Mac Lugh

" you need to be more flexible."  My water witch's words rang in my seemingly thick skull.  "more flexible?" I questioned silently to myself.  That's a first.  All my life, well up until I married my now Ex-wife, people always told me what a laid back "go with the flow" kind of guy I was.  Now many years later and a lot of water under my bridge I am being told that I am not flexible enough.  What, by Lugh's spear happened to me? 

                Taking her words in I began to explore how I am now, how I was then, and how I got here.  It seems to me at some point during my travesty of a relationship with my ex that I lost my flexibility.  I think it was likely a result of trying to survive and emotionally abusive and liable time of my life.  It probably did help me survive those times, the problem however, is that I am no longer in that situation and such a way of being no longer serves me.  Point in fact it is creating a lot of unnecessary stress in my life, which was the motivation that started the conversation in which my wife told me I needed to be more flexible.  So how do I change? 

                The warm spring air was pleasantly playing across the bare skin of my chest, shoulders and back as I sat before my alter.  The sacred fire lit, the well and tree hallowed, I called to Bridghid, the spirits of the land and the stag, and my ancestors.  I had come to seek their wisdom and advice on how to become more flexible with situations.  I began my chant, and it wasn't long before I stood before the open gates and stepped through to the spirit world once again....

                As stag and I walked in the woods side by side, my hand gently resting upon his back he said to me "you lack flexibility because you are attached to outcomes.  When events happen that make those outcomes no longer a possibility you aren't letting go of that, and it is causing you stress.  Desiring a certain outcome is natural, but holding onto that desire, that attachment, is not the way of nature. " 

                So it is. When we hold onto our expected and desired outcomes or situations and they don't happen we are going to feel stress, pain, frustration, and resentment.  The cure is to be mindful of what is going on internally and when we sense that holding on, that attachment and desire for a certain outcome, we must take a deep breath and let go.  Then and only then can we gracefully flow through our day, our week, our month, our year, and our life.