The ethics of death and dying

One of the classes I am taking at this time is the Ethics of death and dying. I thought I would share some of the writings I am required to do for this class. Our first major assignment is to write how we would like our funeral.


The Death of a Modern Druid
I have ever been a simple, but deeply spiritual man. In that tradition I see no reason why my funeral should be any different. I have spent my life trying to teach people how to live a good and happy life. How to live with honor, compassion, and a reverence for all things. I love to hear a story and at my funeral I want my story shared in the hopes that those who attend will take something away from it that opens their heart and/or mind. Something that gives them hope or at the very least a good laugh and a memory.
The Wake
When I die and pass over to Tir Na Nog, I want to die in my home surrounded by family and friends. I’d like to stay in the home a day to give those whom I leave behind time to mourn in whatever way they need to, be it to pay respects, to eat and drink, or to support to those who need a shoulder to cry upon. I’d like the woman closest to me, my daughters, my wife, others in the pagan community, over seen by Elena to cleanse my body both physically and spiritually. I would then be dressed in my ritual robes. I do not want my body preserved in any way other then cold storage. I do not want any kind of chemicals put into me. I always tried to live a natural and healthy life. I want that to continue in death. I simply want my body cremated. If possible I’d have it done on a large bonfire in some natural space. Sadly laws prevent this sort of thing. I will make myself content with a cardboard box and an oven. If possible I’d like a few things in that oven with me. I’d like a triskele symbol, as well as my wedding ring burned. The Awen symbol would not go amiss either, and last but not least some thing to represent “Stag” my spirit guide and friend. Any who would like to attend this portion are welcome to, though I suspect it happens so quickly after death that not too many will be there. I’d like my ashes collected of course in a nice box. Perhaps something with meaning, but I’ll leave exactly what it looks like to my loved ones.
The Eulogy
I’d like my friends and family to come together in some natural place in the presence of a great oak tree. Perhaps in a park or some one’s personal property or in the sacred grove I plan to build. I’d like Elena Rose, the priestess who married my love and I, and the sister of my heart, to lead a ritual. I ask that she invoke one of two deities. The Morrigan if I should die by violence or Mannanan Mac Lir should I die a natural death. These are the gods that will take me to the summer lands. I ask that she remind those there of the triskele symbol and it’s meanings of life, death, and rebirth. Remind them that I am going to take some time in the summer lands to review my life, and rest my soul before I will once again be born back into the world. I’d like a Celtic harpist and other Celtic music at my eulogy. I’d like it to be festive and fun. I want people to tell stories about me to each other. The funny and the sad. The mundane and the special. I’d like them to remember…never let the truth get in the way of a good story! I’d like a list of my accomplishments read out aloud so that the Gods, Spirits, and honored ancestors will take note. (So too, I hope, will my children and grandchildren). I am not fond of grave yards, nor of head stones, or other markers. No, I do not want any of these. For my ashes I’d like them divided into thirds. Each third shall be cast into one of the three realms of earth, sea, and sky. If my dream of creating an outdoor temple for use in pagan rituals has come true, I’d like my ashes spread there. One third for earth at the roots of the oak tree. One third for water on the water fall. One third on the chimes or sculpture that represent air. In so doing know that my spirit will be there to protect the sacred ground until I am called again to be reborn. If my dream has not yet come true, then I ask that my ashes be spread at the root of a great oak tree for earth. At the top of Iwihinmu (mt. Pinos) for air, and in the pacific ocean for sea.
During the Eulogy between speakers I’d like the harper to play a song. I’d also want a release of butterflies at the service like my wife and I did at our wedding to honor our ancestors. At the end I’d like there to be a feast in my honor. In my mind I see attendees bringing food as in a potluck. I’d like everyone to sit at one long table. At that table I’d like a place set for myself and food placed there. When the feast was over I ask that the food be sacrificed to the fire.
Cost
Cremation………………..$695.00
Cremation Container……..$50.00
Urn………………………..$495.00
PA-system………………...$195.00/day
Harpist……………………$200.00
Butterflies 1 doz………….$95.00
Total………………………………$1730.00
Consulted
The two people I consulted on this project were Elena Rose, and my wife Janet. I wanted Elena to be the one to lead the Eulogy and ritual at my death, however since we are so close, I wasn’t sure she would feel she could. I was surprised to hear her say with much confidence that she felt she could and would be honored to do so when the time came. I bounced some of my ideas off her and she fielded them all without flinching as is the practical nature of an earth witch. Talking with my wife was a little different. It was her who gave me the idea of the butterfly release, however I could tell that the discussion made her feel a bit odd or uneasy and we did not discuss it long. Perhaps our recent brush with death made it all too real for her to discuss without getting emotional at this time.
















Resources
www.cremationsociety.com
www.meetingtomorrow.com/catagory/pa-system-rental1
www.livebutterflies.com
http://www.gigmasters.com/Search/Harp-Bakersfield-CA.html

wow...where have I been?

Well Last saturday night things took a turn for the worst in my wife's health. There were complications after her ERCP which caused internal bleeding. She passed out in my arms early sunday morning. I rushed her to the ER and we stayed in the hospital till Tuesday. They had to do another procedure to correct the problem. I have been home taking care of her these past few days as well as getting caught up on my homework. I haven't been able to do my daily mediations like I usualy do. I have snuck it in here and there. Any rate, the above is my reason for no Blogging. As she heals and is better able to care for herself, I'll have more time to blog again.

Elemental journy, end of air, beginning of fire

I have travel, once again, through elemental air. I say once again, because I have done it before in wiccan studies, in AODA studies, and now in OBOD. Not that I mind, working the elemental journy is something a person can spend a life time doing and still always learn new things. So what did I learn or what changed for me this time around? Well, it seems to me that my mind is a bit quicker. I am finding that I am better able to pull up information and things I learned long ago are more available when needed. I am also finding that I am better able to discern the B.S. from the solid info. My mind has always been very open, so I don't feel a lot of change there. I do feel even more balanced then I was before I did this element and that feels nice. My mind is certainly getting a work out these days between three college classes, work, and my bardic studies. On a cosmic level, at the end of elemental air work, as I was walking to class, a single feather from an albino pigeon floted down to me and I was able to catch it. I didn't see the bird from which it came, so it seemd to just have appeared. I am taking it as a sign that I am did well.

This week I began another journey through elemental fire. It is begun with the OBOD fire ritual. My meditations this week are all about fire. Yesterday I invoked elemental fire and asked it some questions. one of which was simply "what do I need to be aware of?" the response I got was "be aware of the one with red hair". No idea what it means yet. perhaps it means I need to spend more time with the goddess Bridget. Maybe it means some one with red hair will come into my life and I need to be aware of their motives. Yesterday I did recieve a friend request from some one I knew in High school. He has a very slight tint of red to his beard. Perhaps that is whome it spoke of? time will tell. Wish I was better at this whole spirit/diety invocation stuff. I feel like such a cement head at times.

Healing spell update

It is now the beggining of day three after the group healing work done on my b'loved. All in all, I would say it has helped. Though she is far from being totally healed, it seems to me the pains are lessoned, but more then that I suspect a change in her mental attitude. She's not as angry, though still a bit frightened. Though it seems to be a simply, if painful, case of gallstones, there is that little bit of fear that worries if it isn't some thing more, like cancer. I myself don't feel such fears. With the aid of my daily magical practice and meditations I find myself not only staying centered, but thinking how silly it is to wast the energy and tears in worrieing about something that will most likely never be. Ah, but worry, it seems to me at least, is not rational. No, and in point of fact, trying to rationalize it away will only take one so far. I am not much of a worrier. Never have been, though there have been times. So how does one not worry? Well, I supose it's because I stay in the present and mentaly work with what is, or at least with what is truly known. To worry, is to loose oneself in an illusion of ones own creation, which is perhaps the most powerful kind of illusion there is. Worry does not change facts, worry only wasts ones energy and focus on the things at hand. I don't worry, because I accept. I accept the destiny the Gods, spirits, and ancestors place for me. I don't worry because I know that I have the wisdom to create the fate for myself that I want. To clearify, destiney are the cards we are dealt. Fate is the results of how we play those cards. Fretting over what cards I shall be dealt...well that's sillyness.

The other Harvest

The Sun no longer gets up so early, nor does he stay out so late. I can sense the change, I feel his old age in the air, land, and sea. Despite that the summer court is still staying on strong here this week. Today was only 106 degrees of Farinhieght, the day before was 110. I spent a good portion of it sitting outside in the shade of a tree I only wish I knew the name of on the campus of the college I am attending. I watch all the kids standing around just out of highschool. I must seem an odd old man with long hair to them, sitting all alone under my tree, book in hand. I find myself examining my life and thinking about what things I have planted and what I am now harvesting because of it. I can't help but smile, my harvest this year is abundant and amazing. Love is my corn this year. By corn I don't mean the yellow stuff grown in the new world, but by the deffanition of my largest crop. There is plaque in my parent's house that says "plant kindness, harvest love". It seems I have done a lot of that this past year. Mostly through the Pagan meetup I started and led. In October I am going to find out if the hard work I planted in my classes is going to come to fruite as I apply at the hospitals for a sponsered seat in the college's nursing program. I think of all the love both my wife and I are harvesting now in our lives as she strugles with her illness. Thank the gods that we see the surgeon on the morrow. I hope we can get her schedualed soon, and start harvesting some healing.
As per the OBOD training, I have also been looking at some of my past experiances, revisiting them as it were. I then do my best the thresh the "grain" from them. Those that no longer serve me, I let them go to where ever the place is that forgotten memories go.
I am still doing my daily meditations, I have harvested a lot from those over the year. Balance, peace, strength of mind, and magickal power. I am preparing to start the two dragon ritual at Alban Elfed.
I and my friends are making preperations for Pagan Pride Day here where I live. I was thinking of doing some story telling, but with the busyness of school and taking care of my family, I felt it would be stretching myself to thin.
And so the days of summer role by. Belinus reminds us yet again that he is still strong, that his time has not yet ended. I know the winter court is just waiting though, biding its time. The wheel turns ever on, as it has since the beggining.

Done in a new way

Yesterday while at College, I wanted to do the CoP but without being obvious. I sat myself under a try, put on my headphones and played shamanic drumming to drown out the sounds of construction, and people's conversations, as well as to put me into an alterd state of mind. I did the CoP entirely from the spirit world. It was a nice way to do it. The energies had a different quality to them. I'd call it more vivid.

My b'loved has been the focus of a lot of magick and medicine. I and others have "thrown" a good amount of healing energies at her. I would have to say it has all helped. Today she has another Dr. apt. with the GP, I assume she'll get a refurel to a surgeon. Tonight we some members of the pagan meetup are getting together to do a group healing ritual. It should be interesting. I am not leading this shindig this time, and that's ok with me. I am there to be a battery.

I think that what was stopping me from doing a healing spell earlier for my b'loved was the fear of it not working. I'll have to explore that a bit. I suspect it will take me to deal with issues of "fear of failure". We shall see!

muddling through

These last two weeks my Love has been suffering through Gallstone attacks. We are awaiting to hear from a the Dr. and refural to a surgon for removal of the gallbladder. In the mean time I am doing what I can to bring comfort to my love. Teas, painkillers, magick. Anything and every thing. I also am trying to keep the house clean, the fridge filled, and get ready for school starting again on Monday.